Living on Borrowed Time as an International Student in the U.S

I’ve seen so many people expressing their anxiety about the H1B lottery lately, and it hit me hard—because I’ve been there. I know what it feels like to refresh your email a hundred times, to hope against hope, only to see those dreaded words: “not selected.” So, I wanted to share my experience, not just to vent, but to let others know they’re not alone in this.

Every year, I tell myself, "maybe this time."Maybe this will be the year my H1B lottery entry gets picked. Maybe I’ll finally get the stability I’ve been chasing since the day I arrived in the U.S. as an international student. But year after year, the result is the same—“not selected.”

The first time, I was disappointed. The second time, I felt numb. My OPT clock was running out. I watched friends celebrate their approvals while I scrambled for options. Eventually, I chose Day 1 CPT—not because I wanted to, but because I had to. It was my only way to stay in status and keep working toward my future.

But with H1B selection rates dropping every year, I can’t help but wonder how long this journey will last.

Most nights, I lie awake with the same thoughts circling my mind. “What if I never get picked? What if I have to leave the life I worked so hard to build?” The uncertainty is tough, but I know I’m not the only one feeling this way.

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Oh belive me , you are not alone! Though it is a very lonely world to live in as an international student, no one to talk to - because most of people won’t understand; no one to complain - because I was the one who chose it. Just as you said you live or I would say exist, from one approval to another be it another school acceptance, or another OPT, or CPT, until hopefully, that one day you won’t have to carry that burden of agony anymore and it maybe will be the happiest day of our lives. Thank you for your pos, somehow it made me a little less lonely…

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Thank you for your warm response! It made me feel better as well…

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